Ice, Ice, Baby
by J38
Summary: I honestly could not resist! Vanilla Ice's beat, with an X-spin!


Author's Note: I'm sorry, I couldn't resist. I apologize if anyone acts in-character. I don't own Ice, Ice, Baby, or and of the characters in this fic.

**Ice, Ice, Baby**

The bar is quiet, with many strange people sitting at the booths. A man in yellow and blue spandex, another wearing a quartz visor, and a man in a wheelchair are just a few. "Next up at the karaoke booth, Bobby Drake!" The MC said into his microphone. Iceman stood up on stage and nodded to the DJ, as the music began.

"Yo, VIP, Let's kick it!" Iceman begins dancing to the beat.

"Ice Ice Baby, Ice Ice Baby" Iceman slows his dancing, and begins belting out the lyrics.

"All right stop, Collaborate and listen  
Ice is back with my brand new invention" Iceman ices up into his ice form, and begins ice sliding around the room.  
"Something grabs a hold of me tightly  
Then I flow like a harpoon daily and nightly" Iceman pauses as the other x-men leap onto the stage and yell "Will it ever stop?"

"Yo -- I don't know  
Turn off the lights and I'll glow  
To the extreme I rock a mic like a vandal  
Light up a stage and wax a chump like a candle." Iceman begins his dancing again as the X-men wave their hands back and forth through the air. Gambit bobs his head and taps his foot to the beat.

"Dance, Bum rush the speaker that booms  
"I'm killing your brain like a poisonous mushroom  
deadly, when I play a dope melody  
Anything less than the best is a felony" Iceman slides into a full split and winks at a cute blonde in the audience.  
"Love it or leave it, You better gain way  
You better hit bull's eye, The kid don't play" Iceman points at the door, and Wolverine turns around and knocks out Bullseye, who was just entering.  
"If there was a problem, Yo, I'll solve it  
Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it" Iceman smiles and manifests a pirate's hook from the air moisture. The rest of the X-men chime in.

"Ice Ice Baby Vanilla, Ice Ice Baby Vanilla  
Ice Ice Baby Vanilla, Ice Ice Baby Vanilla" 

"Now that the party is jumping  
With the bass kicked in, the Vegas are pumpin'  
Quick to the point, to the point no faking   
I'm cooking MCs like a pound of bacon" Pyro throws some of his fire through the air, as Iceman throws some bacon-shaped ice into the flames.  
"Burning them if they're not quick and nimble  
I go crazy when I hear a cymbal  
And a hi hat with a souped up tempo   
I'm on a roll and it's time to go solo" Iceman kicks the rest of the X-men off stage, knocking Xavier out of his chair.  
"Rollin' in my 5.0  
With my ragtop down so my hair can blow  
The girlies on standby, Waving just to say Hi  
Did you stop? No -- I just drove by  
Kept on pursuing to the next stop  
I busted a left and I'm heading to the next block  
That block was dead" Iceman slicks the entire stage with ice, and slides on his knees to the very edge of the stage, singing at the top of his lungs.

"Yo -- so I continued to A1A Beachfront Ave.  
Girls were hot wearing less than bikinis  
Rockman lovers driving Lamborghinis  
Jealous 'cause I'm out geting mine  
Shay with a gauge and Vanilla with a nine" Iceman creates a large number 9 out of ice and drops it on the stage.

"Ready for the chumps on the wall" Iceman points at Juggernaut, Sabertooth, and Toad sitting by the wall.  
"The chumps acting ill because they're so full of eight balls  
Gunshots ranged out like a bell  
I grabbed my nine -- All I heard were shells  
Falling on the concrete real fast  
Jumped in my car, slammed on the gas  
Bumper to bumper the avenue's packed  
I'm trying to get away before the jackers jack" Iceman makes an inappropriate gesture to the audience.  
"Police on the scene, You know what I mean  
They passed me up, confronted all the dope fiends  
If there was a problem, You, I'll solve it  
Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it" Iceman, heartily enjoying himself, begins flipping and sliding through the air, as the X-men sing.

"Ice Ice Baby Vanilla, Ice Ice Baby Vanilla  
Ice Ice Baby Vanilla, Ice Ice Baby Vanilla" Iceman nods at points at himself the whole of the chorus.

"Take heed, 'cause I'm a lyrical poet  
Miami's on the scene just in case you didn't know it   
My town, that created all the bass sound  
Enough to shake and kick holes in the ground" Iceman dances a little too hard and smashes a hole in the tiny stage.  
"'Cause my style's like a chemical spill  
Feasible rhymes that you can vision and feel   
Conducted and formed, This is a hell of a concept  
We make it hype and you want to step with this  
Shay plays on the fade, slice like a ninja" Wolverine stands up and slashes his table to shreds for no apparent reason.

"Cut like a razor blade so fast, Other DJs say, "damn"  
If my rhyme was a drug, I'd sell it by the gram  
Keep my composure when it's time to get loose  
Magnetized by the mic while I kick my juice  
If there was a problem, Yo -- I'll solve it!  
Check out the hook while Deshay revolves it." Iceman laughs and steps off the stage, as the X-men finish the song.

"Ice Ice Baby Vanilla, Ice Ice Baby Vanilla  
Ice Ice Baby Vanilla, Ice Ice Baby Vanilla" For the final encore, Cyclops fries Wolverine.


End file.
